Gender and Mobility
I wonder if I could wander too,
like the way you always do –
With no purpose, with no aim,
With no fear, and with no pain.
like the way you always do –
With no purpose, with no aim,
With no fear, and with no pain.
but, oh lord! I am scared to go outside!
for, I hear of women losing honor and pride!!
for, I remember those times you tried -
to grope me till I bled… till I was dead inside…
and yet, it was me instead, who was told
to put on a brave face, and to be bold
every single time I was forced to let you glide
every single time I was coerced to let things slide
to put on a brave face, and to be bold
every single time I was forced to let you glide
every single time I was coerced to let things slide
You come on strong to me shamelessly;
whether my intention was to go out aimlessly.
Whatever you do, you are never blamed.
It’s me always who should feel ashamed.
whether my intention was to go out aimlessly.
Whatever you do, you are never blamed.
It’s me always who should feel ashamed.
It intrigues me to see you act so tender.
How you “protect” me in the name of gender!
You define my appropriate attires, times, and places!
and you restrict my mobility in public spaces!!
How you “protect” me in the name of gender!
You define my appropriate attires, times, and places!
and you restrict my mobility in public spaces!!
Every time I struggle, strive, and demand for my rights;
Either I am molested, assaulted, raped, or we have fights.
I am never safe; not even during broad daylights.
But you have all the claims to both days and nights.
Either I am molested, assaulted, raped, or we have fights.
I am never safe; not even during broad daylights.
But you have all the claims to both days and nights.
Every inch of my movement is premeditated.
If I cross the line, the whole world gets infuriated.
Every one of you expects me to be domesticated.
Even in private spheres, I am segregated.
If I cross the line, the whole world gets infuriated.
Every one of you expects me to be domesticated.
Even in private spheres, I am segregated.
End this nonsensical negotiation of gendered spatial society!
Will not the world be better if there is more variety?
Do not expect me to be your symbol of piety.
You also have no right to blame me for notoriety.
Will not the world be better if there is more variety?
Do not expect me to be your symbol of piety.
You also have no right to blame me for notoriety.
I too can be mischievous, playful, and I too can dillydally.
I too have rights over transports, vehicles, roads, and alleys.
I too long to loiter, to linger, to dawdle, and to stroll.
Because I am a human; I am a woman; and not at all a doll.
I too have rights over transports, vehicles, roads, and alleys.
I too long to loiter, to linger, to dawdle, and to stroll.
Because I am a human; I am a woman; and not at all a doll.
I thought
I loved you so much!
but perhaps
Death loved you even more !!
It snatched you away from us
into the land far far away.
All I could do was –
watching you…
watching you being gone…
There you were –
right in front of my eyes
and yet,
you were not.
The moment you were lost
I stopped finding myself at all!
I tend to search for myself
and again get lost
in the whirl of memories bitter-sweet!
A moment strikes me once
and I see you smiling there …
The next moment knocks me over
and I see you
struggling to breathe …
struggling to live …
Ahh ! bleeding you were
every pore of yours!
Along with your blood
I drowned in floods of tears !!
None a soul stood near …
just they kept saying
that they could not bear …
Yet I stood by your side
holding your hand …
Just when you were leaving me
into unknown land …
Yeah, I could not endure too,
but leaving you in a corner
of that so-called intensive care!
All I so wanted was
you could be with
someone near, someone dear!
Do you still remember?
You were not alone there …
not alone at all then …
not alone at all now …
In midst of all machinery
you stayed silent and
suffocated under the ventilator!
And I just kept watching you –
watching you gone …
Ahh ! miserable me !!
No one lives forever.
Yet had you only stayed behind
just for a while,
just a few moments more,
to watch flowers blooming!
to see everything glowing !!
Alas!
You are gone …
Away you went –
fading my days away
darkening the nights under that sway
tearing the heart in shreds
shrouding your beloved in grief
Yeah, away you went after all.
still,
all I can do is watch –
watch you suffering!
watch me suffering !!
how I wish!
had you just
hold on to life a bit more!
had you not
let yourself go a few moments more!
how I wish!
how can I say how much I miss!!
I scream silence
when I can't stand silence screaming!
lost in the tides of isolation,
I try to fetch myself
only to grab melancholy
whispering silence ...
melodies I find not to hum,
and silence clamors in my ears:
all I can hear is a hush /
sense a restless repose ...
I fade into this frenzied fluster
where I relate not to a single sound...
so shrill a silence pierces my shadow
and I lie silent as a grave.
sometimes I cease to exist.
i walk through the waters
feigning the footmarks
as i drift along the tides ...
and here i am,
sinking along with the sands of times ...
i turn back to see if i lived,
behold ! after a while
i too dissolve into nothingness
just as these footprints in the sand …
strange though,
slipping sands do make this tangible ground
but the poor me!
remains elusive ...
perhaps i am -
a figment of my fantasy!
